Perfecting my squat
It seems mere months ago, I could leap tall buildings at a single bound. Dance anyone under the table.
I’ve been exercising for decades, starting as a pre-teen, my mother dragged to me kicking and screaming to what was then called a “calisthenics” class at the local Y. That it was a men’s only class did not daunt her. In we plunged, Mother older sis and I. Soon other women became brave and in time, the class became officially Co-Ed. By the time Calisthenics became Aerobics I was hooked. I needed my exercise fix. I could kick like a Rockette. When I auditioned for Dragon’s Den, I did a cartwheel. (It didn’t help)
And then there was Yoga: long before Dragon’s Den, back In the 70’s my mother was again a Maverick – finding a remote Yoga Retreat on Paradise Island, in the Bahamas. Now, it’s a gentle hub of education and yoga classes, but back then it was considered a cult and I told nobody. However we stuck to the exercise classes, and soon I mastered the Bow; the Scorpion, the Crow. For the next decades, where others went to Mexico or Hawaii or Jamaica, the Yoga Retreat was our ideal recuperative vacay. 4 hours of Yoga daily, along with Yoga Practices of Meditation and shared responsibilities. I could Half Lotus for hours. A headstand became my go-to party trick. I was ripped and flexible.
Of course, when COVID hit, all those exercise and Yoga classes stopped, and so did I. I eventually did Online Yoga, but it wasn’t the same, nor were online Aerobics. Still, I felt all the years of kicking ass and stretching should’ve counted for something
But then I hit 70 and I found myself experiencing a second menopause.i (insert ‘scream’ emoji). Along with the new improved hot flashes, no amount of core or stomach exercises were going to eliminate the continued expanding mid section. Happily the weight looks good on my face but just below, my neck is taking on the appearance of a Sharpee wrinkle dog.
Fortunately, those years of exercise toned my arms and legs, which kept their cool as my stomach and boobs took over the front of my body.
Some months ago, I went for acupuncture. After a quick body scan – taking in my arms and legs and the half lotus that I could still do – she took pity on me kindly saying and said, “It’s just bloating.We’ll get things moving and it’ll go away.” Would that it were just bloating but no. The extra weight is here to stay. Which is one of the reasons, I’m sure that I’m not spry anymore.
Where before, I could gracefully fold into the forward bent, touching my toes with ease and congratulating myself that I could ‘reeeeelax into the posture’. No more. My stomach just gets in the way. The shoulder stand? Fuggedabout it. Stomach almost suffocated me.
I decided to try chair yoga, ‘For those who have a hard time getting onto and up from the floor’. However, since being able to get up from the floor is critical as we age, so I’m gingerly, awkwardly – it isn’t pretty, there’s no spry to be seen – managing to get up off the floor in several stages.
Recently I decided I would try to kick start my Yoga practice by spending 4 days at the Yoga Retreat. I could have wept with happiness hearing there was a beginner class, which I joined with all the other old men and women. My traveling companion – my younger daughter – did the Advanced Class. Four hours of yoga every day. 16 hours of Yoga. We beginners trying valiantly to do the Sun Salutation, each waving hello to the toes we cannot touch.
My two daughters, who have perfect figures, tell me I’m still doing great; I’m focusing too much on my stomach. They say look at what you CAN do.
Which brings me to the Plank. An 8 Day Hanukah Plank Challenge, put forward on one of my ‘socials’ led to me to become up my planking. Now, I’m a proud 3 minute planker. As for those legs that won’t let me ‘lotus’, I can squat forever.
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